First Entry: Beware the Maggi Noodles.

If your like me, who can't be bothered to make a decent meal from scratch and enjoy it an hour or so later, than you probably find yourself turning to your local noodle department on more than one occasion.

I'm pretty sure it fairly common for a food store to sell noodles these days, there are sorts of different noodle types to choose from, like the famous 'Pot Noodle' or the not so famous 'Nong Shim: Shin Ramyun', with all these good products to chose from, which one did I pick, you ask?

I chose Maggi Noodles, 3 minutes.

Can you imagine how loud the ominous music in my head was?

Before I even realised what I was doing, I was walking out of the shop with the devil in my bag, unable to stop my legs from walking home. I would have loved nothing more than to turn around and return it to it's shelf for those who were fortunate enough to have never eaten one single pack, and buy into the lure of the well recognised brand,

Now, don't get me wrong, I love the brand Maggi, I especially love the sauce, it so rich and powerful in flavour that it can add flavour to anything food, making the intolerable, tolerable.

But whoever came up with the idea of having the brand, try their hands in the vast noodle industry needs a good whacking behind the head because the product is, now I will put it nicely.

A simple mess.

Now how bad is it?

Well, why don't you look at this image of me popping the noddles into the pot and see if this looks tasty to you.

  

Yum.

Now, doesn't that look like your taste buds won't die just by being close to it?

If I could be bothered, I would have left the vile thing for 10 minutes instead of 3, and yes, I know half of the actual produce will be burnt, but at least it would add's some much needed flavour to it, but even that won't help it's case.

Once the thing posing as food, was done, I drained the water from the pot into the sink and placed the rest in a bowl. I won't show you the image because it's just too unappealing for me to display, but the jist of it is, it looks like a poor imitation of golden rice.

I'm pretty sure that wasn't the effect they were going for though....

However, it is unclear to me, if this was done by accident or on purpose, can you imagine the product developers just yelling. "TO HELL WITH IT! WE'RE PART OF A WELL RECOGNISED BRAND! WELL MAKE MONEY NO MATTER WHAT WE PUT ON THE SHELVES, EVEN IF IT'S COMPLETE GARBAGE!"

Am I the only one who can see this or is it just me?

Now about the taste...my god the taste.

How would you describe it?

A part of me died, when my tongued tried to poorly grabbed a hold of one strings that made up the sloppy mess littering my perfectly good plate, one strand of noodle was so thin, that your chances of grabbing a large bundle of them were slim to none.

And the feeling on my tongue.

Just wash away the horror...just wash it away...

A word of advice, make sure you have something to wash it down immediately after taking a sip because your in for a bumpy ride, i'm pretty sure that 60% of the whole noodle was poorly disguised water while the other 40% was curry flavour from a shady spice seller.

Not only is it terribly bland, but taking a dive and eating it while it's still hot, is one of the worst possible things you can do, it makes it even more unbearable for your poor stomach, you taste buds will be overwhelmed with the strong combination of heat and water and a little flavour thrown into the mix.

I didn't ask for tea, I asked for noodles.

However, all was not lost in the cold darkness, bottomless abyss called 'the victim of greed', for there was a savour.

It's name...

Maggie sauce.

Luckily I had my trusty Maggi sauce close to me, to add flavour to this lifeless husk that dare call itself noodles.

I was wrong.

So very wrong.

Why didn't anybody stop me?

What have I created!?

Yes, the sauce made it more appeal to the eye, but it did almost nothing when it came to the taste itself.

Maggi sauce had failed, is this beginning of the end?

However instead of trying to make it edible, I just did not dare to tempt fate by adding spices and herbs directly into the bowl in hopes of it become decent, I might have accidentally created a monster called 'The Maggi Virus ' if I tried, and let me tell you, there is nothing worse than having Diarrhoea over food that fails in ever aspect that it needs it to succeed in.

If the brand wasn't so well know, I'm sure this monstrosity wouldn't have lasted a week on the shelves before it was called back.

Maggi, if your reading this, stick to the sauce industry or hire better product developers, because your clearly superior in that aspect and your clearly not ready to hit the noodle business just yet.

To my readers who just so happen to stumble onto this post.

Avoid this food item at all cost, not only will your tastebuds from the smell alone but remember, why should you pick this mess when you have hundreds right in front of you that can guarantee you flavour, and make you less likely to reach out for several packets of crisps and several cans of diet coke?

Did I also mention that this product makes you crazy thirsty afterwards, I can't count how many times I've rushed to the sink even when I was sure, my stomach would burst.

Introduction To Me.

Okay, I suppose I should introduce myself since this is my blog and I will be posting very frequently.

I am a 19 year old, female, animation student.

I hope that one day, I can become either a great animator or land myself an online job with great pay as a writer or something similar.

This blog is pure for entertainment purposes and I have no intention of trying to make money out of it until further down the line.

What this blog is about, is reviewing the food that I pay for from my local food store, wither it's a local supermarket or just a corner shop, I will be reviewing them all with complete honesty, and a pinch of humour.

I do not expect anything to come out of this or make me money, if you haven't noticed. I didn't immediately rush to the line of people who want Google to pay them to stick their already long nose into more of my business.

I'm sick and tired of buying products with little too no taste, when they display proudly that the've won one award or another, so I writing this blog to tell people what they should avoid at all cost and what they should pack on the pounds in their shopping basket.

I'm a women that was born in Africa, I made the transition to a British Citizen, roughly at the age of three, and let me tell you, those born in Africa pride themselves on flavour.

We pride ourselves on being able to make you immediately reach for the nearest bottle of water because your tongue feels like it's being roasted alive by the sun.

We pride ourselves on cooking good quality meet with rich herbs and spices, that would make you beg for more, if your like me who grow up tasting your foreign mother or fathers dishes, than you know the stuff they sell on the streets in Britain doesn't hold a candle to that.

I've been living in Britain, nearly all my life and let me tell you, unless you have a professional cook book in hand to guide you with making food from scratch, have a different ethnic background and buy or care about the quality of the food you buy, than you know you have landed in great Britain.

The home, where at least 70% of the food here is terrible and the rest is just okay.